Killing me to love you
by Rafaperez
Summary: Uncanny X-men. The moment when Charles receives Moira's dear John letter, breaking their engagement.
1. Chapter 1

**Author:** MoiraShipper

 **Summary:** Uncanny X-men. The moment when Charles receives Moira's dear John letter, breaking their engagement.

 **Enjoy. If you're reading, leave reviews, it helps the author.**

 **Chapter 1-Killing me to love you**

 _I, I'll bring you home, it's been so long_

 _Aah we're fighting the light back to where you belong_

 _It's growing faster than you've grown_

 _Now you're stronger than yourself_

 _I'm fighting for you_

 _I'm hiding for you_

 _But it's killing me to love you_

 **Killing me to love you-Vancouver Sleep Clinic**

" _Dear Charles, forgive me for writing this letter while you're at this terrible place, but I can't take this anymore, wait until you're_ _back. No, this isn't true. I won't be able to tell this in your face, I can't marry you, Charles. I'm giving you back our engagement ring back. Don't ask me why, just respect my decision and move on, because I'll do the same. Moira."_

God, it's been a month since Moira's letter, but it still hurt the same because now, more than ever, Charles knew that she'd been the love of his life and he had lost her, to Joe, after going to the war.

Now he was flying back to Oxford, to an empty apartment, full of memories of Moira and him, a hole in his heart and the ring in his pocket. Sometimes he wished he could be man enough to erase the memories he had of her, but he just couldn't do that, they'd had great and magical moments together, the precious nights exchanging words of love... Even though now this love was killing him.

Why, why had she changed her mind about them?

 _In a week Charles would be leaving for war so he and Moira had been spending all the time they still had together. Charles was sitting in the bed, feeling nervous while watching Moira in the bathroom, brushing her hair before joining him._

 _In his pocket he held a ring he intended to give to the woman of his life. He loved Moira more than anything in life and wanted to make her happy, she was beautiful, smart, had a big heart and, had accepted him, even knowing he was a mutant, but he was nervous, even had seeing in her mind that she felt the same, he knew it wouldn't be easy for them, with the war and, with her father that didn't like him._

" _So serious, Charles..." Moira said, curious, sitting in front of Charles and touching his face gently and kissing his lips, before asking: "Thinking?"_

" _In how much I love you, love." Charles told her, sincere and the beautiful smile she gave him melted his heart and she murmured, touched, still smiling:_

" _I love you too, Charles... You make me so happy..."_

 _And Charles smiled, leaning over her and kissing her with passion, being invaded by her scent that drive him crazy. Moira raised her other hand to his shoulder to hold herself, while Charles held waist, caressing it int he kiss's rhythm and she parted her lips for him, greed for his touch._

 _The telepath caressed her waist, feeling her tremble while held his shoulder tighter and he brought her body to him, being invaded by her thoughts of him, until they broke the kiss to breath and Moira leaned her forehead against his, blushing and they stayed like that for some time until Charles looked at her:_

" _And i promise to always make you happy." He told her, serious, taking her hand that had been on his cheek, while taking the ring from his pocket, his heart racing and Moira's eyes widened, feeling the air leave her, touched, while staring at him._

 _Charles took a deep breath, staring deep in her eyes, feeling her nervousness, the same he was feeling and then, he gave her hand a squeeze, calming her and he said decided, his voice soft and sincere:_

" _I know I'm leaving for war, but I'm decided to marry you when I go back, to have you by my side, always happy, if you want it too Moira, love."_

" _I..." Her voice tremble for a moment and then, she opened a beautiful smile and said, feeling the happiest woman in the world: "I want you, Charles."_

"I know you don't want me to ask you, but... Why, my love?" Charles whispered, gripping the letter with the ring, his eyes sad while seeing Oxford appearing between the clouds and for a moment, one of them reminded him of Moira's face, so beautiful and full of life, her hair framing her face and shoulders.

He released his breath, trying to avert the cry threatening to escape from his throat. Even though he d decided to do what she had asked him to, he still was going to the wedding that afternoon, even if he was going to stay outside the church, keeping his distance, because he needed to see if she was at last happy. He didn't care about himself, but about her.

Charles laid his head back against the armchair of his seat and drunk quickly his whiskey, feeling it burn his throat, protecting him from feeling the pain and sadness and then, in the clouds, he saw Moira's face again while her red lips whispered:

"I'll always love you."

"Me too. Even if this love is killing me."

"Well... it was you who left first." The face whispered bittersweet, leaving Charles in shock and sad..

 _TBC..._


	2. Oblivion

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 **Chapter 2-Oblivion**

 _Are you going to age with grace? Are you going to age without mistakes?_

 _When oh, oh, oh and oblivion, when oh, oh, oh and oblivion_

 _When oh, oh, oh and oblivion, when oh, oh, oh and oblivion_

 _When oh, oh, oh and oblivion, when oh, oh, oh and oblivion_

 _When you play it hard and I try to follow you there_

 _It's not about control_

 _But I turn back when I see where you go_

 **Oblivion-Bastille**

The church was all decorated in white, with only the closest member of Moira and Joe's family and friends, all eyes on the couple, Moira beautiful in her white dress, but even with the veil on her face, Charles could see her smile was fake and he couldn't help but read her mind. It showed her nervousness, sadness and regret, but still, she was stand there, tall, with her decision.

And then, even from behind the door ajar, somehow, Moira's eyes met his in shock, her face pale and lips parted while seeing the man she loved and that had left there, feeling all the air leave her lungs and Charles felt the same.

He should have known that it wouldn't have been easy for her to wait for him during the war, even with his promise to marry her, because her father hadn't allowed. Yes, she had made her choice, but it had been him that had done that first and she had decided to live with that and move on. But what about him? Would he be able to forget everything and leave, or would he correct his mistakes and save them from the misery?

"Charles..." She whispered, letting her flower bouquet fall while all eyes turned to the door, seeing the bald man entering the church, serious, ignoring all the stared, his eyes on Moira while he thought to her:

 _I'm so sorry for leaving you here and then, for not respecting your wish about moving on. But I needed to see if you were truly happy..._ He thought, his voice full of regret, seeing her shake her head, still in shock and Charles took a deep breath, approaching ever even more, his heart beating fast, afraid it would be too late.

 _I made the mistake, but now I'm here to correct it. I just don't want you to go ahead with this marriage if it's just because is what you father wants, but because you want._

Moira's eyes widened and slowly, her feet started to move toward him, but then Joe held her by the arm while her father put himself between Moira and Charles, furious at her and the unwanted guest.

"Leave, soldier! You won't ruin my daughter's life, heard me?"

"I'm here to correct my mistakes, sir. I should never have left without marrying her first." The telepath said, serious, his eyes turning cold at what the older man was thinking about his daughter, immature and wild.

"I would never have allowed that!"

"The choice wouldn't have been yours, with all due respect." Charles reminded him, making the other man even more furious at the telepath.

"Leave me, Joe!" Moira said, angry, freeing her arm from her groom's grip and walking toward Charles, ignoring her father and Joe, her heart beating fast and then, her eyes started to shine in tears and the woman started punching him on the chest with all her force, but without much effect, not managing to move his body. All her frustration, fear, longing and love she felt for Charles were taking control of her body, at the same time that the relief for him being there.

Charles then stopped everybody around them, letting Moira to keep punching him, until he saw it was enough and he gently held her wrists, making her face him and she shook her head, eyes shining.

"You're an idiot, Charles Xavier." She murmured, frustrated. "Why did you have to come, even after my letter? I told you to move on!"

"I know, my love..." He murmured gently, even knowing that maybe he didn't have the right anymore to use that words of love, but he saw the surprise on her face at hearing them and her face the softened a little.

Charles removed the veil from her face carefully, seeing her beautiful and blushing and he kissed her forehead, making her relax.

"Why?"

"Because I love you. Because i made a mistake, I should have told you how much you meant the world to me, should've seen that it wasn't going to be easy for you to satay here with your father. I had to tell you this and now, I can live with my mistakes. But you? Do you really want to marry Joe? You have to decide." He told her, serious, but his face was soft.

If marrying Joe was the right thing for her, was what she wanted, he could lvie with that, but not if she was being obligated.

"You should have told me it before leaving, idiot..." She whispered, but she wasn't angry, she felt relaxed for him being there, correcting it all and making her see her own mistake, marrying without love because her father wanted.

"I... I just want you." She admitted, opening a beautiful smile that melt Charles. "I'm so sorry too, I should have found a way to explain to you what was happening, even with my father watching my steps..."

"It's okay now, my love..." He promised and she nodded, while he unfroze the guests and then, he whispered, full of courage: "I'm ready to marry you, if yous till want."

"I want to marry you more than anything in my life." She told him, her voice full of emotions, feeling a huge happiness in her chest, seeing Charles take the ring from his pocket and out in in her finger gently, admiring it before kissing the metal.

"I love you Moira Xavier and I promise that I'll always make you happy, and out it in first place my love, and I'll never forget how much you make me happy..." He promised, sincere, his voice full of love, seeing her so happy while Joe and her father started at the scene, furious.

"I love you too Charles, and I promised to grow old with you, loving you forever." She replied, her heart beating fast, while putting the other ring on his finger carefully and then, she closed her eyes, happy, feeling Charles caress her face, before meeting her lips in a kiss.

She smiled, parting her lips for his tongue, feeling the man remove the veil from her hair and she ignored her father's protests, who then was impeded to move by Charles with his minds, before the couple left the church, the white dress floating with every step of the couple, who left without looking back.

Later, that night, Moira was laying on Charles's chest, satisfied, staring at his big hand, covering hers over her belly, looking at their rings while playing with his fingers. Their wedding hadn't been official, but she didn't care, she was happy and all she needed was Charles.

"Are you happy?" Charles murmured with a beautiful smile, listening to her thoughts, loud in hid head and he caressed he bare shoulder, before kissing the spot, breathing in her sweet scent and making her heart race.

"More than ever..." She said softly. "Thanks for coming for me."

"Always." He leaned his head on one hand, keeping the other hand over hers on her belly, staring at her brown eyes that shone and he whispered: " I could never forget you."

"Me too." She confessed, still smiling, knowing it was true, that everything in that letter was bullshit and Charles caressed their joined hands while they got lost in thoughts, happy for being there, together.

"So, what are we going to do now?" She asked, curious and he smile, hoping she would like the idea.

"I'm thinking about moving to my mansion in America with my beautiful wife, opening our school there..."

"I think its brilliant."

And she turned to him, kissing his lips while Charles removed slowly the sheet covering her, revealing her body and caressing her with passion, feeling her hands finding his own.


End file.
